I am on a mission to declutter, and purge my home over the next year or so. It is not that it’s out of control “Hoarder” episode material. It’s just that on our last move, I brought several boxes, and extra things with me that I really didn’t need – it was just an “oh, just throw it in the moving van, and I’ll deal with it later” situation. My house is very small – and I want it all gone. It’s been almost 5 years!
This past week, as I dug out my Christmas cards, (Yes, I still do send Christmas cards to a dozen or so people in my life), I found a box of old cards and letters from years past. Well over 35 years ago! I poured a hot cup of coffee, settled into my chair, and started reading, and sorting, and laughing, and reminiscing, and crying a little too, over the memories of times gone by. I miss those letter writing days.
Sadly with our current means of communication, there really is no need to actually sit down and write a letter. Email, Facebook, texting – something like “video killed the radio star”, “internet killed the writer”. Don’t get me wrong – there are some positives about technology, but that’s another post.
A letter can communicate so many things that an email never could. They are personal – they contain your effort, your handwriting, and your choice of stationery. Before the words are even read, you have sent something that no one else could send. No one else has your handwriting or taste in cards. In a way, there is something vulnerable about this. You are revealing part of yourself to the recipient, and that immediately softens the heart. I found myself picking up a letter, and before I knew who it was from, I recognized the handwriting. It made me smile.
Letters are hard work compared to texting or typing. It takes work to find your cards, a pen, stamps, and then to trek to the post office to mail your letter. To physically write the words you could type a lot quicker, communicates value to the recipient. It tells them, that they are worth the effort. They are also inexpensive, yet the impact is sometimes bigger than a $50 gift.
Letters can be reread, and be encouraging in difficult times – they force you to speak slowly, and writing your words forces you to think before you write.
Letters can give the gift of time. The recipient hears your words without the pressure to respond immediately, or to respond at all. Face to face, emails and texting puts pressure on one to respond within a certain time frame. Letters are less stressful and gives the recipient the gift of time to process your words, and respond in their own time – or not! Sometimes sending a letter is just a way to remind someone they are on your mind and that you care. It’s like leaving the door open. “I was thinking about you. I care about you. I would love to see you.” It’s my way to remind them: my door is open whenever you want to come in.
Letters can build relationships. You can communicate through letters that you love and care for people – tell them they are important to you. Over
time, letters can build up a failed relationship, or be a solution for strained family relationships.
time, letters can build up a failed relationship, or be a solution for strained family relationships.
Letters cannot be debated. If you have trouble getting your thoughts and ideas communicated, sometimes letters force people to hear you out. They may not read your letter, but it’s hard to resist a hand written letter, so they likely will.
Letters can console the grieving, strengthen the weary, and soften hearts. Letters can ask forgiveness, or gently confront. You can send them to family members, neighbours, friends near and far, and even your "enemies." You can leave them for your spouse or roommate. You can give them to your Starbucks barista, your mail carrier, your grocery store clerk. Sadly, in this day and age, the latter may seem a bit creepy!
I miss it. I treasured every moment of the last few hours reading, and re-reading some of your old letters. Thank you, for bringing me that joy today, and all those years ago, when I first received them.
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