A Lesson Learned

From Melissa M.H. in Angola Indiana.

This story brought tears to my eyes - Although my kids are considerate and thankful most times - I'm sure they would have benefited even more so with a lesson like this...
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Two Christmas's ago my then 12 yr old son made a very rude and hurtful comment about a gift he had received. It wasn't the exact one he wanted, so as calmly as I could I quietly took the gift (still in its box) and set it aside. 

About an hour later he went to play with it. I immediately stopped him and explained to him how very, very fortunate he was. And how his comment had hurt my feelings. 

As he started to apologize and back pedal-I told him how much I appreciated his apology, however, he would not be getting this gift and that one of two things were going to happen; either he was going to think about all of his classmates/friends/church family etc., and HE could choose whom he thought would not normally get such a gift and give it to them OR I would make the decision-but either way, he was not keeping it.

He threw a fit, cried and carried on, which I completely ignored even though this situation was breaking my heart.

A few hours had gone by, when I noticed my son sitting on the floor carefully re-wrapping the gift. 
I sat down next to him and watched as he concentrated on getting it just right. When he was finished he looked up at me and said "Jack's" dad doesn't have a job anymore so they probably didn't get very many toys, can we please take this to him right now?

I privately called "Jack's" mother to explain the situation to make sure it was "ok"- the last thing I wanted to do was offend anybody. 

My son was silent the entire ride there and the entire ride back. I started to wonder if I had done the right thing! But as we pulled the car into the garage he said "mom I'm sorry". I gave him the biggest hug you could imagine, kissed his forehead and told him how proud I was of him!

And every Christmas since then he has either picked one of his gifts or saved his money and bought one, to give to someone he chooses!

All parents and parents "to be" should put this in their box of life lessons...

Life is the Hot Chocolate

This random thought is timely. With my ongoing search for a home to call my own; I am obsessing over wall colours, flooring and counter tops."the cup" so to speak - I now realize that I must choose with my head, a little of my heart (ideally my wallet) in the end it is up to me to make this house my home. "the hot chocolate"
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A group of graduates, well established in their careers, were talking at a reunion and decided to go visit their old university professor, now retired.

During their visit, the conversation turned to complaints about stress in their work and lives. Offering his guests hot chocolate, the professor went into the kitchen and returned with a large pot of hot chocolate and an assortment of cups -porcelain, glass, crystal,some plain looking, some expensive, some exquisite - telling them to help themselves to the hot chocolate.

When they all had a cup of hot chocolate in hand, the professor said: 'Notice that all the nice looking, expensive cups were taken, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is normal for you to want only the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems and stress.The cup that you're drinking from adds nothing to the quality of the hot chocolate. In most cases it is just more expensive and in somecases even hides what we drink. What all of you really wanted was hot chocolate, not the cup; but you consciously went for the best cups...And then you began eyeing each others cups.

Now consider this: Life is the hot chocolate; your job, money and position in society are the cups. They are just tools to hold and contain life. The cup you have does not define, nor change the qualityof life you have. Sometimes, by concentrating only on the cup, we fail to enjoy the hot chocolate that has been provided us. The hot chocolate is there for the taking, man chooses the cups The happiest people don't have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything that they have.

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. And enjoy your hot chocolate

How do you live your dash?

I read of a man who stood to speak at the funeral of a friend.
He referred to the dates on his tombstone; from the beginning…to the end.
He noted that first came his date of birth, and spoke the following date with tears. But, he said, what mattered most of all was the dash between those years.

For that dash represents all the time that he spent alive on earth…And now only those who loved him know what that little line is worth. For it matters not, how much we own; the cars…the house…the cash. What matters most is how we live and how we love - and how we spend our dash. So think about this long and hard… Are there things you’d like to change? For you never know how much time is left - that can still be rearranged.

If we could just slow down enough, to consider what’s true and real - and always try to understand the way other people feel. And be less quick to anger, and show appreciation more - to love the people in our lives, like we’ve never loved before. If we treat each other with respect - and more often wear a smile…Remembering that this special dash, might only last a while.

So, when your eulogy is being read, with your life’s actions to rehash… Would you be proud of the things they say - about how you lived your dash?

Linda Ellis